Fears

When I was little I had many fears. 

A fear of not having my Daddy around. 

A fear of dying young.

A fear of heights. 

A fear of not being perfect in school. 

A fear of hospitals.

A fear of Bob from Twin Peaks at the foot of my bed. 

As I grew, new fears came while others remained, or altered a bit. 

A fear of not remembering the very few memories I had with my Daddy.

A fear of dying young, without being remembered by my loved ones.

A fear of falling - sky diving & cliff jumping, but no longer heights. 

A fear of losing my straight A status (until I met Mr. Turner in Calculus Honors.) 

A fear of any of my family or friends needing to stay in a hospital.

Bob, forever a terrifying sight of him kneeling by a bed with a smirk on his face.

Some silly, some overcome, and some hold strong today. 

But those fears were merely child's play compared to the fears I possess since becoming a mother. 

My biggest fear now is that I fail as a mother. 

That I fail to teach my kids to be kind, loving, examples of Jesus Christ. 

That I fail to teach them manners and social skills that will allow them to be cognizant of others feelings and needs. 

That I don't provide them with enough opportunities to give, to be aware of their personal blessings, and want to share with others in any way they can. 

I fear that I will raise them to be entitled spoiled children, because I really do want to give them everything and help them in every way. 

I fear that I won't recognize the fine line. 

I fear that I am not setting a good example for them to be all that I know they can be. 

Just as Howard W. Hunter said, as discussed at church last week, “I pray that we (my kids) might treat each other with more kindness, more courtesy, more humility and patience and forgiveness. We do have high expectations of one another, and all can improve."

 

This helps ease my fears. 

Howard W. Hunter said, "If we can pattern our life after the Master, and take his teachings and example as the supreme pattern for our own, we will not find it difficult to be consistent and loyal in every walk of life, for we will be committed to a single, sacred standard of conduct and belief. Whether at home or in the marketplace, whether at school or long after school is behind us, whether we are acting totally alone or in concert with a host of other people, our course will be clear and our standards will be obvious. We will have determined, as the prophet Alma said, 'to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places that [we] may be in, even until death.' (Mosiah 18:9.)"

93 pairs of warm fuzzy socks for the good men and women who are spending the Christmas season at Hi-Desert Continuing Care Center.

Faced some fears today.